I've found that no matter where you are on the parenting journey, it's so helpful to have a mentor who is just a stage or two ahead of you. Years ago during the stage where we had three kids under four, I remember one particularly rough morning when I had exhausted my resources of books, games, puzzles, and snacks....all before 10 am. I secured the kids in their various containment devices (bouncy seat, exersaucer, and watching Clifford) and stepped out on the porch for a couple deep breaths of fresh air and a little perspective. Feeling a little better, I went back inside and we continued our day...
until lunch when there was a knock at my front door. My neighbor across the street (in the picture above) who had four middle and high school kids at the time was standing on my porch with a pot of hot soup and freshly baked bread. "I noticed you on the porch this morning," she said. (Great, I thought - trying to remember if I had even been dressed yet). "I recognized that look and the way you were deeply breathing and just wanted you to know that you are a GREAT mom and you're doing an amazing job. Enjoy a nice, hot lunch." She gave me a hug and turned to go back across the street. Right then, I vowed that I would be that to other moms. An encourager and supporter - not someone who pretended to have it all together, but vulnerable and open and willing to build into other moms along the way. (And not just when I left the phase of scraping cheerios out of my hair and actually wearing real pants. Right THEN.) My neighbor and I get together every so often and I love to hear stories about her kids and how she handled things, successes and challenges, perspective from someone who is a little farther along the journey than I am. It really is true that no matter what stage you're in, someone else is just behind you needing encouragement. So seek out a mentor and learn from their wisdom and get out there and encourage!
until lunch when there was a knock at my front door. My neighbor across the street (in the picture above) who had four middle and high school kids at the time was standing on my porch with a pot of hot soup and freshly baked bread. "I noticed you on the porch this morning," she said. (Great, I thought - trying to remember if I had even been dressed yet). "I recognized that look and the way you were deeply breathing and just wanted you to know that you are a GREAT mom and you're doing an amazing job. Enjoy a nice, hot lunch." She gave me a hug and turned to go back across the street. Right then, I vowed that I would be that to other moms. An encourager and supporter - not someone who pretended to have it all together, but vulnerable and open and willing to build into other moms along the way. (And not just when I left the phase of scraping cheerios out of my hair and actually wearing real pants. Right THEN.) My neighbor and I get together every so often and I love to hear stories about her kids and how she handled things, successes and challenges, perspective from someone who is a little farther along the journey than I am. It really is true that no matter what stage you're in, someone else is just behind you needing encouragement. So seek out a mentor and learn from their wisdom and get out there and encourage!
3 kids who are 4 and under...yep, that's me. I am in those days right now. I can relate to that moment - I've had a few!
ReplyDeleteI'd love to be encouraged by a posting on what it's been like for you to have 3 kids growing up so close together in age. I grew up in a family of 3 but my oldest brother is 7 years older - very different dynamics. Do tell: what's it like as they're older to see their relationships forming?
This story made me cry! I love your neighbor and I love you for sharing these insights with us newer Mom's....can't wait to read on....
ReplyDeleteIt may not be the same, but I feel like your blog is doing that for me. It's great to have a picture of the future. It's encouraging to see proof that kids get older. And great to learn from you. Thanks
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